I could hear the emotion in my wife’s voice as she read her part in the Passion from the Gospel of Matthew during our Palm Sunday service this morning.  As I listened to this account of what our Lord did for us, I recalled my reflections and my sadness when I pray the Sorrowful Mysteries.  It brought me back to the sorrow and grief I felt during a retreat where I presented a PowerPoint program of the Stations of the Cross by projecting artists’ renditions of the suffering and death of our Lord. 

As I left the Mass to go to the assisted living facility where I was to lead the communion service for the 16 members of our community of St. Teresa of Liseux, I was given the word to take some of the booklets from the church to present the Passion for them.  As I was just about to leave, my pastor saw me collecting books and asked that I did not take them since he was concerned that there would not be enough for the 10:15 Mass.  At first, I obediently began to return them, but stopped short of submitting to his request and rationalized that 4 or 5 would not be missed.  What I did not know at the time was that this sin of disobedience was to lead to an amazing experience for me and the 16.

As the people gathered in the TV room where we have our service, I prayed about who would take the roles of narrator, speaker, Jesus, and the people.  I decided to be the narrator and then asked the daughter of one of the residents to be the speaker.  The role of Jesus was first offered to John who left his glasses in his room and gracefully declined.  At that moment, Bob entered with his wife Kathy who is in a wheel chair.  As he struggled to push her chair through the narrow aisle, I could tell that he was not in a very good mood.  I knew immediately who was to play the role of Jesus.  Though I expected some resistance, he dutifully accepted. 

I began the reading and soon realized that this would be an emotion filled experience for all.  As Bob read his second part; “Amen, I say to you, one of you will betray me”, his voice cracked and his eyes filled with tears.  As the Gospel account went on, Bob struggled with the emotion of reading the words of our Lord.  As I listened to his struggle, I was tempted to finish for him as he paused to collect himself.  The Holy Spirit responded in my mind with a “don’t even think about it, this is for him to do!’  I obeyed and we proceeded.  At the end, I embraced him and thanked him for what he had done.  Little did I know, Bob’s courage was much deeper than I imagined.

Later that evening, I contacted the social director of the facility to relay to her the emotional experience we all had that morning.  She paused as I finished telling the story.  She collected herself and then told me that this would probably be Bob’s last Easter.  Just this week, Bob was told that the chemo for his cancer was not producing the desired effects.  Bob was truly walking side by side with our Lord as he read His words.  Bob’s cross was as real as Jesus’ cross.

In earlier blogs, Dan and I have written about how God’s hand is in everything and how he watches over us every second of our lives.  We have come to know that if we listen, even if it means disobeying our pastor, He will help us stay straight the path.  The will of the Father is that we let the Holy Spirit lead us.  He is never wrong, He makes no mistakes, and His timing, not ours, is what is best.  I struggle so much with patience.  I want things fixed and I want it now!  What a mistake it would have been if I would have tried to fix Bob’s hurt and finished his parts when he paused. 

Our Lord accepted the cup.  He drank from it willingly.  He struggled as all men struggled.  He asked that He be spared, but collected Himself as Bob did and finished his role.  Jesus knew of His Father’s love for us.  He knew that He had to die so that Bob and all of us would live. 

Peace,
Mike